Author: The Croppie

Team Bargain Bucket, Sponsored by KFC

Now we’re gonna have to call him Big Time Hine. Just weeks after retiring from the fields, the brain cell behind Team Clandestine, world famous artist Dene, has finally found the adulation and acknowledgement he’s so desperately sought. Forget the appearance on Chinese television, Hiney has only gone and got himself a gig as a guest on the finger lickin’ good KFC Mysteries show. Pitted against Somerset’s most hapless true believer Pete James in a cringeworthy debate (one that’s serving as a giant promo for the fast food chain), flat cap wearing Hiney reveals his tenuous grip on crop...

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Alien Shit Found Near Crop Circle

Hold the front page! Circle Chasers contributor Josh Kerson claims to have found an extraterrestrial turd close to a crop circle at East Kennett during the summer of 2017. In one of the most matter-of-fact, hilariously weird posts The Croppie has seen in a long time, Kerson says ‘I flew and lost a tiny drone, the wind took it away to another field … It started to rain harder, so I went into the woods a little bit, and then, I found some alien scat. Seems the aliens that made this one [crop circle], got out, and took a...

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2020 Circles: Roundway, nr Devizes

Reported: 13 September 2020 Location: Roundway, nr Devizes, Wiltshire Lead photograph by Nick Bull The placement of a crop circle is probably just as important as its physical appearance. The elegance of this ‘double S’ formation arrives at what is surely the end of a weird season in an even weirder year. It’s location is equally bizarre … a lodged field at the edge of Devizes. The Croppie prefers this...

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Team Dim Expose Their Own Hypocrisy

It was less than ten months ago that Team Clandestine’s Dene Hine told his Facebook audience he’d had enough of media outlets who don’t go out of their way to tell everyone crop circles are manmade. ‘This year you will only see crop circles that are made by teams to be flown by people to continue the mystery,’ he raved, referring to the Crop Circle Connector and photographers such as Steve Alexander, Hampshire Flyer and Nick Bull. ‘None of my creations will be available to these people. If and when I create my art it will be exclusive.’ How...

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2020 Circles: Chirton Bottom, Nr Urchfont, Wiltshire

Reported: 5 September 2020 Location: Chirton Bottom, Wiltshire Lead photograph by Nick Bull The Croppie had thought the season had ended after the combines rolled through the fields and brought in the wheat. Instead, this rather unusual circle, with a hint of the old school, has probably pulled the curtain down on what will be remembered as an odd, disjointed...

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Dear Croppie: How Come the Crop Circle Connector is First to Everything?

Sometimes things need to be said without beating around the bush. So here are two questions that are repeatedly thrown at The Croppie. One, just how does the Crop Circle Connector know the locations of new crop circles before anyone else does? Two, just how does the Connector get photographs of these new formations at the crack of dawn on the same day the circles are reported? Once upon a time crop circles would be formed in locations where they would be easily visible and readily discoverable by the public. Model locations for this ‘organic’ method of discovery included...

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Readers Recipes: Israeli Fruitcake

Here at The Croppie we love crop circles and everything associated with living the life of a circles enthusiast. By popular demand our legendary reader’s recipes section is back and begins with the return of its biggest hit: the Israeli fruit cake. It’s best eaten at Rosh HaShanah La’Ilanot, a celebration of trees, the natural world and environmental awareness. However, it can be made and eaten at any time of year and goes great with a mug of hot, steaming coffee. Note that this recipe will give you a somewhat different, dense fruitcake which has a very long shelf...

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A Conspiracy Against Particular Crop Circles?

Over on Circle Chasers a poster called Tomasz Kaczmarek has noted how some circles are ignored by websites such as Temporary Temples and the Crop Circle Connector. Kaczmarek asks ‘Is there any conspiracy against some crop circles that do not [match] somebody’s agenda?’ He notes how two sorta similar looking formations have been treated very differently by the aforementioned websites, one featured and one excluded. Hopefully The Croppie‘s knowledge of what goes on behind the scenes can clear this up. There’s no conspiracy, it’s simply a matter of a crop circle’s origins. During 2019 the Connector parted company with...

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Dear Croppie: Online Circles Speak

It can be hard to keep up with all of the intricacies of crop circle discussion online and from time to time The Croppie gets asked about it. This handy guide should help you in making sense of all the bickering, arguing and puzzling terminology that you’ll come across. Accusation bank: What’s up, buttercup? Someone giving you a hard time in the croppie Facebook groups? React by hysterically falling back upon your bank of stock insults which we have heard time and time before. For example, ‘narcissist … troll … crazy … obsessive … stalker … racist … you...

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A person with an interest in the crop circle phenomenon. Such individuals may be of varying belief, sanity and intelligence.

The Croppie:
The Croppie was established in 2015 to cover all aspects of the crop circle phenomenon occurring across Britain. This includes new formations, circles history, conspiracies and related culture.

Get in touch with The Croppie by clicking here or by sending a direct email:

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