About That Stick

The Croppie was entertained by Hugh Newman’s photo of the recent circle at Longwood Warren, near Winchester. Planted in the middle of the formation was a short stick. Whether deliberate or otherwise, it was an amusing throwback to events in the same field from a few years back. On that occasion the team involved left a marker pole behind in the central circle.

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Photograph by Hugh Newman

Give Up, Enzo

Crop circle claimant and money-seeking medium Lawrence ‘Enzo Brabazon’ Gibson just can’t stay away from the crop circle world. Despite it being clear his website I Am Alien is nothing other than a revenue making exercise, despite proof of his ‘predictions’ being anything other than what he predicted, this space oddity has emailed The Croppie asking for ‘an audience with [the] editor … to explain how I am currently working out (largely) the design of the crop circles this year before they have arrived.’

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Sorry, Lawrence. It just isn’t happening. The Croppie isn’t interested in all of the nonsense you’re making up. You’ve no psychic ability whatsoever and if you are sadly deluded if you believe otherwise.

Those Broad Hinton Ads

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Photography by The Hampshire Flyer

It may hurt some croppies who refuse to believe otherwise, but all three of the circles to have been made between Broad Hinton and Hackpen Hill are, in essence, giant advertisements. The latest was a set of crosshairs and is identical to that found on a t-shirt currently being sold to promote the campsite at The Barge Inn.

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When You’ve Hit Rock Bottom

Let’s remember it’s just flattened corn.

Some of this season’s crop circles have provoked jaw-dropping online meltdowns by Team One Watt’s self-serving Dene Hine.

At the same time as he’s sniping, the self-proclaimed ‘great artist’ has been on the sidelines without anyone to work with — hence the nine watt drop in name. That must really hurt. As a suggestion to ease Hine’s pain, his agent Hamish Jacobs has been using Facebook to lick the rear of former circle maker Matthew Williams.

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Yes, the same Matthew Williams that Hine so spectacularly sold out for a fistful of dollars during the making of Tencent Production’s now legendary crop circle reality show.

Yet it seems Hine and his agent are now ready to start afresh with Williams, as if Dene hadn’t put pound signs before friendship.

‘As a professional acquaintance, I miss the guy too,’ sniffled Hine on Facebook, as if he hadn’t put money ahead of Williams. ‘I would be happy to forget anything happened and crack on. I’ve lost enthusiasm. Not much longer to regain it.’

Jacobs was quick to misremember history too, throwing an arm around his client as he did so:

‘Good on you, Dene. That’s the way. Forgive, forget, onward, and upward. Rise above all the crap.’

Bring on the reunion. It promises to be just as explosive second time around.